You Didn’t Stand a Chance, Kid.

View Rodney’s original article on Adventures in Cuisine

“O.M.G. So Tasty. There your article is done.”  This was the advice I was given by my cousin when we were trying out the new Sin City Smashburger.

And I considered that being the entirety of my writing. Why not? Then I thought, what the hell, why not just write about it. So I did.

When I walked into Smashburger to eat the Sin City Smashburger, I did so with a clear plan. This was not to be just any trip for a burger. This was to be a Smashburger throwdown of epic proportions. A battle for bragging rights. You see, there is already a specialty burger available in Phoenix, called the Arizona Smashburger, but now for a limited time engagement, here came the Sin City variety to challenge for supremacy. I was determined to declare a winner.

The Incumbent

It is no secret that I love southwestern food and am an Arizona native, so I rather enjoy the Arizona Smashburger. What is the Arizona Smashburger? Well:

• 1/3 or 1/2 lb Patty
• Habanero cheese
• Guacamole
• Lettuce
• Tomato
• Onion
• Chipotle Mayo
• Fresh Jalapeños
• on a Chipotle Bun

Not quite the ring of twoallbeefpattiesspecialsaucelettucecheesepicklesonionsonasesameseedbun but nonetheless and impressive representation of what a burger in Arizona should be. As you can imagine, this burger packs a punch. My first thought upon biting in was that it was simply straight heat. Habaneros, chipotles, jalapeños (I know I know) all combined to bring the fire. After the initial kick, I realized just how much was on this burger. The toppings were all over the place, the guac was dripping, it was like a face party and I was invited.

The Challenger

What exactly does the Sin City Smashburger bring to the table? This was, to me, the ultimate in no frills burgers. It has everything I would be craving when I woke up in Vegas with no idea of what happened the night before. (but more on that later):

• 1/3 or 12 lb Certified Angus Beef patty
• a fried egg
• applewood smoked bacon
• melted American cheese
• grilled and haystack onions
• signature smash sauce.
• on an egg bun

This was a burger that was simply all business. Meat. Egg. Grease. That is what I tasted, and it was sooo good. There were no veggies getting in the way here, no frills just simple indulgence. As much as I tried to give each burger equal time, this burger just kept. pulling. me. back.

In the end, for me it was no contest. Whereas I was slightly overwhelmed by the amount of… everything, on the Arizona burger, I really couldn’t taste the actual burger for all the trees, the Sin City burger struck me as having a clean, simple purpose, the exact kind of burger you would desire after an all night bender. The Sin City burger flopped Quad Aces while the Arizona burger was left holding 7-2 off-suit.

Epilogue

Shortly after tasting these burgers, I found myself on the Strip in Las Vegas. Knowing that I would need a good remedy eventually, I checked to see where the Smashburger was on the Strip. Travesty! There is no Smashburger anywhere within walking distance. SMASHBURGER! get on this!!

A special thanks to @PhoenixBites and @SmashburgerPHX for their generosity in allowing my family and I to attend the special VIP tasting event for the Sin City Smashburger.

Announcement by Rodney Hartwig, Adventures in Cuisine

Visit Rodney’s site and read more of his articles at adventuresincuisine.net.